Xenosaga: When Reason Fails
by Kyoki-chan
Summary: Four months after everything was almost wiped out, strange things are happening. Dead people are coming back, dead people in freezers, cosplaying Realians on a ship and much more are happening and there is nothing anyone can do about it...
1. Prologue

**I do not know Xenosaga, though I wish I did so I could kill Shion Uzuki and let everyone else live.**

** I do however own Kyoki and various other original characters that will be joining this little "play." **

**Many characters may seem out of character to help make this fanfic even more funny... at least I hope it's funny.**** Anywho, I hope you enjoy reading this and I'll try to update it as much as I possibily can. **

**Prologue**

(Present)

Gaignun Kukai sighed as he walked onto the bridge of the Durandal-Temporal-Ship-Until-The-Real-One-Gets-Rebuilt (he had not named the ship, the captain, who was slightly insane by normal standards) named the aircraft the painfully idiotic name. Being his normal stubborn self he called it Duteshunthreongere just to frustrate the captain.

The plans for Durandal 2 were already being worked on, so Gaignun had no other choice but to use this current ship as his mode of transportation. It was unknown how long it would take to build considering how much was currently going on.

He walked over to the control panel where a young woman about twenty two years old sat. She had pale white skin and brown hair when. When the woman turned to look at him, she smiled. Her eyes were brown and had a trace of panic within them.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"Uh, M-Master Gaignun, sir." The young woman said, obviously scared of something.

Gaignun looked at the status of the ship from the panel and detected nothing. At first he thought she was scared of a mechanical malfunction or something, but... he found nothing.

"Kyoki, just tell me what is wrong."

"Sir... we're lost."

"What?"

"We are lost in space, Master Gaignun." She bit her lip as Gaignun frantically looked at their current coordinates.

X X X

** I know this was rather short, but the chapters will get longer as time goes by. Please forgive me for any confusion that may occur as the story progesses.**

**Please R&R... **


	2. Chapter 1: Laser Lens Cleaner

**I do not own Xenosaga or any of its characters.  
**

**Chapter 1: Laser Lens Cleaner**

(Five Days Ago...)

"Aren't you dead? I heard that you died. I'm not trying to be rude but in the future I think it would really not good to state my previous employers as dead ghost people." Kyoki Okamiki said, staring up intently at Gaignun Kukai.

Gaignun was currently looking for a captain for his temporal ship until the Durandal was rebuilt. And Kyoki seemed to be the only one available. They were at the Dock Colony at the moment.

He sighed.

"Because you know everyone would think I was crazy if I put that the late Gaignun Kukai was my previous boss on a resume. I-"

"I'm not dead." Gaignun interjected.

"Oh, are you sure? Because some ghost think they are alive, but in reality they are dead. Deader than a doornail, even though technically doornails are not even alive to begin with, but, that is a different story." She coughed. "Are you absolutely sure you are not dead?"

"Yes, I'm sure I'm not dead."

"Well, then, that's good. Then you're hired..." Kyoki smacked her head. "Ah, that's wrong. I'm not hiring you. Hehehehe... oops..."

"Are you sure you are able to fly a ship?"

"Of course I can. I'm a absolutely safe and responsible driver. Your life would be safe in my hands." She smiled.

"Very well. You're hired."

"Yayness!" She jumped up happily.

And thus, this was how Gaignun found himself thirty minutes later on the bridge of his temporal ship.

There were several terminals where seven 100-Series Observational Realians would sit when it was time to take off. Currently they were getting settled into their living quarters.

Kyoki stood beside him as they looked upon the room.

"So, how did you make it back? Seriously."

"Huh? Whatever do you mean?"

"Being evasive, huh? One always ask another questions when evasiveness is needed." Kyoki told him. "I did a thorough background check on you. I just don't go around working for anyone, you know."

There were several moments of silence.

"You see, I heard that your dear father took over your body and made you do things you didn't want to do. In order to put a end to him, Albedo, you, and Jr. made a link-thing and you were sent-transferred-teleported elsewhere. No one knew where you were for four months. Everyone thought you were dead, yet here you are. Alive. Not dead. So... what happened to you? How did you come back here? Where did you go?" As she talked she had moved closer and closer to him until there was merely a inch between them.

Gaignun stared blankly down at her. "How did you come by all of that? You couldn't know that unless you were there."

"You're being evasive once again. I'll tell you how and why I know about you if you tell me what I want to know. Deal?"

He couldn't help but be curious on how she received this information, so he nodded in agreement. "Deal."

"Good. No talk." Kyoki crossed her arms over her chest.

"I somehow was sent to a alternate universe. This universe is very similar to ours. I managed to get the Jr. and Albedo from that realm to help send me back and here I am. End of story."

"Hmm... I believe there is more to this story, but I'll let it for now. As for me, it's my turn to tell. You see, as a child growing up I wanted to be a pirate. As I neared my early teens I began to want to be a ninja. I had a huge dilemma and decided to play around with the two. When I was nineteen I became a freelance ninja pirate. My mom considered that jobless, but oh well. Then one day I saw this ship and I knew I wanted-no, had to be the pilot of the ship. So therefore I needed money to buy it, thus I needed a job with a more steady income. And so, I became a pilot. One day I decided to take my ship and explore a mysterious area. I found myself in a weird place and followed some people to where you and your father were. Just for your information, I was using my ninja cloak so no one could see or hear me as I followed them. I snuck back to my ship afterward and left. And that's about it."

Gaignun was overcome with information he could have lived without. "Right. I see." Though, he really didn't.

"So, when do we need to leave? I'm ready at any time." Kyoki smiled.

"Now would be good." Gaignun told her.

"Okie dokie, sir. Let's go!" Kyoki jumped happily.

X X X

**And that was chapter one. The first five or so chapters are set up to five days previous so you may know what happnened before they got lost. Sorry if it may confuse some people. Umm... I think that is all for now... **

**Please R&R...  
**


	3. Chapter 2: Mom, I Killed My Boss

**Again, I do not own Xenosaga, but wouldn't it be nice if I did? xD  
**

**Chapter 2: Mom, I Killed My Boss**

(Three Days Earlier)

Far, faraway, Wilhelm was floating peacefully in space, talking to himself.

"What should I do now? I already caused a rebellion. Hid the humans home world from them. Tried to wipe out humanity, failed, at least for the moment. Maybe I'll try again later. But for now I need something new. Such as..." He stopped to think for several minutes before snapping his fingers. "My golly, I got it. I'll steal candy from a baby. Virgil always heard that was fun, but never tried it myself. Now I just need to find a ship to take over so I may locate a baby."

Wilhelm laughed lightly as he continued to float in space.

0 0 1

Three days had passed since Kyoki had become the new captain of the ship. Nothing strange had happened like he thought it would. Since the take off Kyoki had seemed as crazy as before. She got along very well with the seven Realians onboard. The eight of them had been hanging out quite a bit, now that he thought about it he began to think he should be worried.

Very worried.

Gaignun quickened his pace to the bridge. He had been heading there to take everyone's lunch order since it was his day to do the cooking since the ship didn't have a permanent cook yet.

For the first few moments he walked quickly, but then he ran. Ran with all his might.

When he entered the command center, he stopped when she saw what he saw. He couldn't believe it.

He stood there for several minutes before realizing Kyoki was talking to him.

"Master Gaignun, what's the matter?" She asked him and seemed to be very worried.

Gaignun looked around at the chaos before him.

Kyoki and all of the Realians were wearing costumes. Strange costumes along with colorful wigs.

"What is going on here?"

One of the Realians walked over to them. She was currently wearing a black spiky wig. She wore a dark blue shirt with white arm warmers. She also wore shirt shorts with blue ninja like shoes.

"We are having a cosplay party." The Realian told him. "I'm dressed as Sasuke Uchiha from Naruto."

"The Realians and I have been planning for this this last two days. I told them they wouldn't have to cosplay, but they really wanted to, so we did. We all decided to cosplay as characters from a old show called Naruto. They use to watch it back in the day on Lost Jerusalem. Now they play reruns on the interstellar waves that travel to my optical sensors. I'm dressed as Kakashi Hatake. I couldn't find a Kakashi wig so I guess I look more like Kurenai. But I have his headband like him so I am him." She wore a blue headband (which had a metal part attached in the middle, it had a symbol upon it) pulled down diagonally to cover her left eye. She wore fingerless gloves. Kyoki wore a green vest over a dark long sleeved shirt. She wore the same colored pants and the same type of shoes as the Sasuke-cosplaying Realian.

"Inter-what?" Gaignun asked, getting more and more confused by the minute.

Kyoki blinked her eyes several times as she stared at him. "... TV."

"Why?" He wondered.

"Because it gets so damned tiring saying 'TV this, TV that' all the time." The young woman explained.

Gaignun shook his head. "I meant why are all of you dressed up so crazily?" He looked at the other Realians. As he looked at each Realian, they told him what character they were.

One of them had short pink hair with a red dress on. She had black shorts underneath. She had on the same type of ninja shoes. "I'm Sakura Haruno." Her ninja band was pushed onto the top of her head.

The one next to her had a wig that was blonde and spiky. She wore a orange jacket over a black t-shirt. The pants were also orange. And again, the same shoes. The band was worn was worn on the forehead. "I'm Naruto Uzumaki."

The third one had a blonde wig that was parted in the back into two ponytails. She wore a tannish kimono type outfit. "I'm Tsunade."

"I'm Jiraiya." The next Realian wore a white wig along with red and white clothing. She wore a fake mole on the side of her nose.

"I'm Orochimaru." This one wore a black wig that came down to her shoulders. She wore purple makeup around her eyes. She was currently wearing contacts to make her pupils more slit-like. She wore a tan shirt thingy over blackish pants. Tied around her waist was a huge bow.

The last one to come over was wearing a green jumpsuit and had hands bandaged up. She wore the same kind of footwear as the others. She had a bowl-cut kinda looking wig. She wore thick fake eyebrows. The skin around her eyes were taped back, giving her eyes a more bigger look. "I am Rock Lee."

"We are dressed up like this because it's fun. Cosplaying makes people happy. You should try it. You could be Iruka, Fourth Hokage or- Hey! Where are you going?"

Gaignun Kukai turned and left the bridge.

"Perhaps Master Gaignun went to go get a costume on." Realian-Sakura suggested.

"Maybe." Kyoki said. "I'm going to go check up on him. Maybe we scared him." Kyoki said as she slipped off her cosplaying outfit to reveal her normal outfit underneath. Her normal clothing consisted of a purple shirt that had two inch straps on her shoulders, a short black skirt over purple shorts that came down to her knees; she wore black boots that came up to mid-shin.

She left the bridge and walked straight. The design and layout of this small ship was similar to that of the Elsa, though the bridge was more like the Durandal... just smaller.

She was about to go left when she saw Gaignun leaning on the wall to her right. His back was to her. He was leaning over slightly. It appeared his right hand was plastered to his chest. His other hand was hugging onto the wall for support. All this scared her, but the most frightening thing was how violently he shook.

"M-Master Gaignun? Are you all right?" Kyoki whispered.

_'Oh, no, what have I done? I've either drove my boss crazy or I've killed him. He's dying right now. I know it! What should I do? What can I do? My mom is going to kill me when she finds out I killed my boss. Not to mention that I-' _she cut her thoughts off, stepping forward.

"Master Gaignun, I'm so sorry for killing you." She reached out and placed her hand on his arm.

Moments later Gaignun, formerly knows as Nigredo, busted out laughing.

Kyoki was so surprised that she walked back all the way to the wall. She stood there, staring at him, as he laughed.

X X X

**Ah, I like working on thsi fanfic. I've decided that I am not going to hold back. I'm going to put whatever the hell I want. So therefore, be warned readers. Be very warned. Muahahahahha!!!**

**  
...Please R&R...  
**


	4. Chapter 3: Boom Boom

** I. Do. Not. Own. Xenosaga. Though I REALLY wish I did...  
**

**Chapter 3: Boom Boom**

After his laughter subsided he looked amusingly at her shocked face.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked.

"You were laughing." She said, slowly coming to realize she had not killed him.

"Well, I can laugh, just like anyone else."

"Yes, I know. It's just that you seemed to always be so calm and collected. And... I thought you were dying..."

"You really thought I was dying?" He wondered.

She took a step forward, her shock gone. "Yes, I did. So when you laughed it surprised me."

"I see. Sorry." Gaignun smiled down at her.

"Tis all right. What were you laughing about anyway?

He was about to laugh again, but did not when he realized that her eyes were brown, brown just like-

"Well?" Kyoki said, putting her hand on her hip.

"I was laughing at how silly all of you look. Especially the Rock Lee one." Gaignun remembered the tape. "What was with the tape?"

"Yea. She was funny. Lee had big wide eyes, so she wanted to use tape to get her eyes wide. I told her she didn't have to do that, but she said she wanted to get into complete character. You're not made we did this, are you?"

He shook his head. "No, not at all. Just a little surprise, that's all."

She sighed with relief. "If it's all right, Master Gaignun, could the Realians and I perhaps have a cosplay day again sometime?"

"Sure."

"Great. 'Cuz we found a room on the ship that had millions of various costumes. You should check it out sometime. Maybe there's a outfit you would like in there too."

"Millions... of costumes?" Gaignun was confused. He never heard of a room like that on the ship from the previous owner.

"Yes. You didn't know about it?" Kyoki asked.

He shook his head.

"Then, Master Gaignun, I should show it to you one day when you have some free time." She grinned at him. "Well, I better go see how the status of the Durandal-Temporal-Ship-Until-The-Real-One-Gets-Rebuilt. I am the captain after all."

"Durandal-what?"

"You know, you're really starting to remind me of someone I REALLY don't like. It's the name I gave the ship. I know it's long, but very descriptive."

"But, it already has a name. The original owner named it Anubis."

"Yes, I know. But did you know that Anubis was the jackal god of mummification and the guardian of cemeteries. Did you also know that he was portrayed as a false god on Stargate SG-1 and wanted to eliminate all life in the universe? Do you really want to have the unfortunate unluckiness if we were mistook as an enemy, an enemy that believes the show Stargate SG-1 is real, and blow us up for our name, do you like the sound of that?"

"You're crazy."

"Yes, I am. As crazy as they come. But I'm just trying to be safe, thus the name Durandal-Tem-"

"Can't we call it something shorter than that?"

"No."

"How about Duteshunthreongere?"

"You're lazy. You just took the first two letter of all those other words to make that weird word."

"All right. Then that shall be it's shortened name." He crossed his arms and turned to go.

"H-Hey now! That's no fair!" She rushed and stepped in front of him to block his path.

Before Gaignun could reply, the whole ship shook. He grabbed the wall with his left hand for support.

Kyoki stumbled forward, her head crashing into his chest.

"Master Gaignun and Captain Kyoki, please come to the bridge. I repeat please come back to the bridge."

Gaignun used his free hand and placed it on her shoulder to help here stay steady.

Moments later, the shaking subsided.

"T-thank you, Master Gaignun." She removed her head and turned around rapidly. "Let's go see what is going on, shall we?"

Without further comment the two of them arrived back on the bridge. All the Realians were back in their normal uniforms.

"What the hell?" Nigredo said, staring out the windows of the ship.

"What's our status?" Kyoki asked as she climbed into her chair and began to read the data.

The Realian who had dressed as Sasuke walked over to her.

"Approximately thirty seconds ago our sensors picked up mass unreadable objects coming toward us. Twenty seconds they materialized all around us. Fifteen seconds ago, we informed you of the problem. We are still on our original course. They have not appear to know we are here and have not attempted to attack."

"There are... so many." Kyoki said as she stared at the large Gnosis all around the ship. There were thousands in all directions. "Do you think they wanted to join the cosplaying party?" She laughed weakly.

"Somehow, I highly doubt that." Gaignun said. "What are they doing? They don't seem to be interested in us at all."

"Isn't that a good thing?" Kyoki asked as the ship continued to move slowly and carefully through the herd.

"If we maintain the current course we may be able to leave the area safely. However, due to the Gnosis unpredictably a few may change their course and interfere. If so, we may be in trouble." Realian-Orochimaru informed them.

"So, in other words, we're safe until they decide to get frisky or notice the ship passing by that has living things that could be turned to possible Gnosisly friends."

"Yes." The Realian replied.

"Yippy skippy." Kyoki said as she began to pull up more information about the whereabouts of the Gnosis closest to them. "Oh no!"

"What's wrong?" Nigredo looked out the window.

"Up ahead a Gnosis is changing course. We're going to crash into it unless we change our path. To do this though, I suggest you sit down and hold onto something."

Gaignun nodded and rushed over to the nearest open terminal and sat down.

Kyoki waited a few seconds until there was a opening to her left. She swung the ship through the opening into a area that had less Gnosis around. She then began to turn the ship forward again.

The ship shook as the nearest Gnosis rammed it.

"What the hell? Why are they attacking us now?" Kyoki asked as she maneuvered the ship steady.

"They must be reacting to our sudden movement." Gaignun suggested.

"Others are approaching." One of the Realians said.

Another violent shake overtook the ship.

"You wanna play dirty, huh? So be it!" Kyoki pulled out a set of goggles and snapped them on over her eyes. Number 4, bring me my cape."

The Realian who had dressed as Naruto ran toward her with a black material. Once Kyoki took it, the Realian went back to the terminal.

Kyoki put the cape on and sat straighter in her seat.

"Realians one through three, direct all weapons forward and only attack the ones in front. Realians four through seven use the Hilbert Effect. Master Gaignun, uh, sit there, relax and look pretty."

"Why direct all the weapons forward?" Gaignun questioned.

"You'll see. I saw something like this in a movie once. Well, not exactly, but close enough. So don't worry.

Even though she had told him not to worry, he couldn't help but do so.

X X X

**Yea... No idea why I added that cosplaying part in now that I think about it... I think it's since I have no life... yes... no life... that is me. XD**

** Please R&R...  
**


	5. Chapter 4:TheEscapeThatWasUnorthadoxed

**I know this is getting old, but I do not wish to be sued anytime soon, so here I go. I do not own Xenosaga. Please do not sue me. And please forgive the randomness of this whole story. I know it seems... .weird at the moment, but once everything gets going it'll make sense... hopefully...**

**Chapter 4: The Escape That Was Very Unorthadoxed **

"All right! Everyone, get ready and hold onto something, things may get a little rocky, but just trust me. I know what I am doing..."

As Nigredo sat, he still didn't feel any better.

Kyoki looked at him and winked before looking in front of her and saying, "Let us begin!"

The ship once known as Anubis picked up speed and began zooming all around the Gnosis.

The Realians were doing as the captain ordered.

Gaignun was unsure of what she was planning, but decided to trust her, even if he didn't have any other choice.

"Gnosis approaching quickly from the right. More Gnosis are following from the rear." Said a Realian.

Another Realian replied with: "Five coming in from the left."

While another said, "More are coming at us from the front. Our weapons aren't slowing them down."

Kyoki looked at the distance from each incoming threat. She smirked as she said, "Good. Right where I want them. Stop firing the weapons."

Gaignun looked at her like she was really crazy.

"Now, everyone, brace thyselves for this may now feel like we are on a rollercoaster ride. Though-" as she spoke the Duteshunthreongere rose sharply upward, pushing everyone back in their seats. "-we won't have to worry about the tracks malfunctioning and pummeling to the ground. We just have a bottomless area of space... nothing there..." For a moment the ship slowed down, but Kyoki picked up speed and they shot straight up.

The Gnosis below them were unable to stop, thus crashing into each other. The Gnosis around them crashed into the Gnosis before them. It looked like a major traffic jam, but instead of cars, there were horrible monsters.

Many of the creatures managed to avoid the pile up and coasted upward right after the ship.

"Gnosis are still following us." Reported a Realian.

"Good. Great. Gorgeous." Kyoki said as she gave out a short laugh that reminded Gaignun too much of his brother, Albedo.

"Now, everyone cease your actions and hold on very tight for up is going to become down in a few moments." She watched in approval as everyone grabbed tightly onto something.

Kyoki put her shoes on her seat and then slid them between the arm rest and the chair. She twisted forward so she was still facing forward.

Once this was all over, Kyoki pulled the controls of the ship toward her which made the machine go in a half circle.

Everyone gripped their seats as the Duteshunthreongere momentarily was upside down. Moments later they were pummeling downward.

They shot clear of the Gnosis flock.

The ones that had previously followed them were stoped by the ever going mass of fighting monsters. They joined the mess as they tried to make their way to the ship. Soon the majority of the Gnosis were fighting and the ship was forgotten.

Minutes later of cruising at top speed, they were far away from the Gnosis.

"We are safe from the Gnosis." A Realian said.

Another sighed. "That was unorthadoxed, but we managed to get away."

"Yea." Kyoki said as she got up from her seat. She stumbled a little which caused a few of the nearest small girls to rush over, but Kyoki stabled herself before they got to her. She smiled thankfully at them. "You guys did a wonderful job."

"You were wonderful too." One of the Realians said. "Your piloting skills really helped save us."

"Ahe, I wouldn't say that." Kyoki scratched her cheek nervously.

"But it's true." Gaignun said walking over to them. "They way you maneuvered that loop was incredible."

At the reminder of the rollercoaster loop, the color drained out of his face.

"Please... excuse me... I must excuse myself..." Kyoki wrapped one hand around her stomach while the other slapped across her mouth as she ran out of the room.

"What's wrong? Did I say something wrong?" Her started at the door, blinking.

"Oh, no. She just has motion sickness." A Realian informed him.

"I'm surprised she held it for so long. She showed signs of sickness toward the very beginning."

One of them noticed Gaignun's worried expression and said, "Don't worry about her; she'll be fine once she empties her stomach."

0 0 2

Minutes later, Kyoki returned with a little bit of color back on her face.

"Well, I feel much better. Did anything happen while I was gone?"

"No, nothing has happened." A Realian told her. The Realians had all returned to their posts while Kyoki was in the lavatory puking her guts out.

"That's good. Anywho, Master Gaignun, while I was in the ladies room, I was thinking." She looked up at him silently.

"Oh." Gaignun was a bit thrown off by this. "Of what?"

"Well, of you. About whether or not you told Jr. of your return."

'No, I haven't." Gaignun told her, he didn't think she would bring that subject up.

"Why not?" She stamped her foot. "If I were him, I would want to know if you were alive and well... I can proudly say that I was once part o the Rubedo-fanclub, and thus can tell you that you should tell him."

"Rubedo-fanclub? Is there such a thing?"

"Of course there is. Why wouldn't there be? Anywho, I had to leave it because-" Kyoki looked away. "It's... let's not talk about me. You!" She pointed at him and jabbed her finger on his chest. "Answer!"

Gaignun sighed and closed his eyes. "I'm not sure how to tell him that I'm alive. Telling him that now may distract him from his task of finding Lost Jerusalem.' He opened his eyes when he felt her punch his arm.

Kyoki glared up at him, her arm still extended. "You are so uber mean. I think you should just call him and say, 'Hey Jr., how's it going? Guess what, I'm not dead anymore. Wanna hang out sometime?' Do you want me to talk to him for you?"

"No, thanks. I'll tell him in a few days. I just need to compose myself."

Kyoki extracted her arm back to her side and nodded. "You shouldn't worry. Jr. and Albedo are your older brothers after all. And siblings have amazing senses when it comes to their family. So deep down I think they already know that you are alive and very well."

He was rather shocked and confused that she knew the truth about Jr... "What are you talking about? Jr. is my son."

She opened her eyes and poked her cheek. "It's not nice to lie to young woman. I know way more about you that I let on. So, remember this for future reference."

Gaignun sighed. "What else do you know?"

"Ah ah. I'm not going to tell." She put a finger to her mouth in a 'shhing' manner. "It's top secret."

Gaignun suddenly remember that she said that she had been when he was 'killed,' so maybe that is how she figured the older brother mystery out. But that was unlikely. She had to have that part out somewhere else. But where? And how?

"Hello? Can you hear me?' Kyoki waved her hand in front of his face.

"What?"

"I asked you what you would like for lunch since it's my turn to cook and your turn to pick the menu."

"Oh, ah..." Gaignun began to think of what he wanted to eat. '_I thought that it was my turn to cook... maybe I got mixed up...'_

X X X

**This chapter was kinda hard for me to write at some points, but it was a lot of fun. I hope it's not too confusing or anything like that. If so, then pm and I shall try to explain. Though I am not a very good explainer of things, thus the crappy writing. . **

**Please R&R.**


	6. Chapter 5: Toothbrushes And Dead Bodies

**I do no own Xenosaga. **

**Chapter 5: Dirty Toothbrushes And Dead Bodies**

Allen sighed as he walked around the empty Elsa. The ship was currently docked att he Dock Colony. Everyone had departed leaving him alone to guard the ship.

"Why did I ahve to be the one to guard the ship?" Allen said out loud to himself. "It makes no sense considering they could just lock the ship up before we leave. But no. I have to stay. But at least... I won't somehow make Shion upset..."

Allen shuddered as he remembered what happened the day before...

0 0 2

Shion and Allen were in the kitchen washing dishes. Everything was going all right, Shion was calm, and they were enjoying the tasks.

That is until he asked a question he later wished he didn't.

Ever since they had headed out on the task chaos left them, Shion had seemed even more short tempereed. Everyone seemed to walk on eggshells around her. Everyone, even Matthews, was afraid to contradict Shion Uzuki. In some ways, it seemed like she was the "shadow captain" of the Elsa.

The simple question he asked as they washed the dishes was:

"Hey Shion, do you think we will find both KOS-MOS and Lost Jerusalem?"

That was it. All hell broke loose.

Shion slammed the plate she was drying onto the ground as she glared at Allen. Fires of pure bitchyness burned in her eyes as she spoke through clenched teeth: "Of course we will, Allen. Why wouldn't we, Allen?" She picked up another plate and threw it across the room.

It shattered everywhere.

"You know Allen, I'm really getting sick of your negative attitude. You're such a spoiled brat, Allen. All you think about is yourself, no one else."

She picked up a cup and threw it at the door, barely missing Hammer as he walked into check out the commotion.

"What's going on in here?" He asked curiously.

"Just telling Allen what an ass he is." Shion said throwing a bowl up at the ceiling. "For punishment he's going to wash out all the toilets and showers with his toothbrush."

Hammer looked at Allen with sympathy.

"But Cheif-"

"MY NAME IS SHION!!" She picked up a spoon and chucked it at him, which struck him on the forehead.

0 0 3

Allen quivered as he remembered having to use his own toothbrust to clean. Ever since then he had tried to stay as far away from Shion as he could.

Allen walked into the bridge room.

"Maybe I should have stayed on the Dammerung with Miyuki and the others..." He sighed once again as he plopped down in the seat he normally sat in.

0 0 4

On the ship Duteshunthreongere there is a large walk in freezer where they keep the frozen food. There are aisles packed with food.

That was where Kyoki was, gathering food for lunch, when she saw it in the far right corner.

She was so scared of what she saw that she dropped the food she had already gathered.

On the nearest pile of frozen food was a human hand, stiff and pale.

Kyoki spun around and ran screaming: "There's a dead body! the foods' being contaminated by a dead body!"

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Meanwhile Gaignun was in his office talking to Helmer. Gaignun sat at his desk, chair pulled up to the table so his legs could stretch out and he could rest his elbows on the table.

"I wonder, does Jr. know of your return?' Helmer said.

Nigredo shook his head. "No, not yet. If you talk to him, can you not mention my return?"

Helmer raised a eyebrow. "Sure, but is there anything wrong?"

"No. I'm just trying to think of the best way to break the news to Jr.. Well, not so much Jr., I'm more worried about Albedo. He'll probably be disappointed that this 'Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes' is still alive."

Helmer laughed. When he stopped laughing he said: "I'm sorry to cuts this short, but I have another call."

"Still busy as usual, I see." Gaignun smiled.

"Busy as I've ever been. Take care."

"Bye." Gaignun said as Helmer broke the connection.

As Gaignun began to think how he would tell his brothers of his status, the door suddenly opened and a crying Kyoki ran in. He rapidly stood and walked toward her, concerned about her crying.

"Kyoki? What's the matter?"

She ran past him and dived bombed under his desk where she sat on her rear, pulled her legs up so her chin was resting on her knees, her arms wrapped around her legs.

"Kyoki, what's wrong?" He kneeled down and looked at her.

She remained silent and continued to cry.

"Kyoki, it's ok now. Calm down, everying is all right." He spoke in a slow, calm tone.

Several minutes later, she had calmed down tremendously.

"... the... food... con...ta...minate...d..." Kyoki whispered.

Gaignun leaned forward so he could hear her. "What did you say?"

She opned her mouth to speak, but quicikly closed it and began to cry again.

Again after several minutes, she was calmed down. During those minutes he realized how small and cramped the foot area was under his desk.

"Master Gaignun, all the food is contaminated. When I was in there getting the food, I saw a hand. A dead human hand. It was stiff and pale... and... contaminating..." Kyoki began to shake.

"A human hand?"

"Yes. I think the person needs help. But I got scared so I ran here to you. I'm sorry. I didn't know what else to do."

"It's all right. You did fine. Do you think you can take me to the hand? Then we can figure out how to help the person if they need help." Gaignun asked her.

Kyoki slowly nodded her head.

Gaignun smiled at her and stood. He held out a hand to her to help her up, which she took. Her shaking subsided as she held his hand.

Though it started back up as soon as she let go.

She looked down where she had just come out and was considering going back under, but froze when Gaignun, who knew waht she was thinking, took her hand.

"Don't worry, you're not alone. I'll be right there."

Kyoki nodded and the two of them headed to the freezer.

As they walked nearer and nearer to the room, Kyoki's grip became tighter and tighter, also she began to move closer and closer to him.

When they arrived she was hugging onto his arm so tightly that he could barely feel it.

"It... it was over here, Master Gaignun." Kyoki said as they entered the cold room. She led the way to where she was when she saw the hand.

But not it was gone.

"No! It was right here! It's gone now!" Kyoki began to move around the bags of food, looking for the hand.

"What?" Gaignun began lookin as well.

"Where could it have one? I know this is the spot because I dropped the food rigth here."

"Hmm, maybe you saw a bag at a strange angle to look like a hand." Gaignun suggested, though he didn't really believe that. Though it was unlikly that a frozen hand could move around on its own, so anythin was possible.

"Maybe..." Kyoki said doubtfully. "I did stay up last night watching horror movies. Maybe I did imagine it. I'm sorry to bother you about this, Master Gaignun."

"Don't worry about it." Gaignun said, patting her head.

"I better go make lunch then." she quickly picked up the food she dropped earlier.

They then both left the room, closing the door behind them.

After Note: I hope that this fanfic is as amusing to read as it has been to write so far. This is all that I have written at the moment and I haven't really worked on this fanfic for a couple of months now... so who knows when I will be able to post again. I'm sorry. But I will try to update this one soon. .


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